Good day or bad day?

Well, I found someone to take my apartment. I'm so happy. It takes a lot of stress off of my shoulders and now I feel like things are looking up... however, I did find out that I am an untrustworthy person. Apparently I say things infront of large groups of people about a friend's personal situation, the friend is by chance is sitting at the same table. Apparently I'm stupid. Apparently I have no respect for other people or my friends and just blab out personal stories for all to hear. I'm sure the person who overheard my conversation heard something, but she obviously didn't hear the whole story. It happens. I just wish that I was trustworthy enough for my word to mean something....

Building shit...

Today in class, we got to build easels for our future classrooms. It was so much fun. I think if I wasn't going to be a teacher, I would definitely be a carpenter. It's so much fun to build things from scratch. I think it would also allow me to be creative. Maybe someday I'll do that. It's really nice outside and that helps boost my mood. I put an ad in the school paper about my apartment so i'm hoping that someone will call and take it off my hands right away. I would just like to get it taken care of. Then life would be grand....

Monday...

Well, it was another long weekend. I didn't do very much at all, but I guess that's ok. I need time to relax. I had to meet with a group at the library yesterday for a final project and it was really frustrating. I just want to get this project done and over with, but the other girls were goofing off and not helping at all. It's not a big deal, it just bugs me when they slow everything down. After the library, I went to my teacher's house and helped saw lumber. We are making easels for our future classrooms this week so that should be a lot of fun. I like getting to play with power tools. Other than that, I don't think I have very much to do this week. Everything is due next week so I need to get things done ASAP because my family will be here this weekend for my Mortar Board induction ceremonies. I'm really excited to see them. Only two more weeks left of school....

Hmmm...

Last night I went to a friend's birthday dinner. It was pretty fun and it was nice to be able to do something. I called my crush afterwards because I really wanted to go and do something and I got no answer on his phone. So I called his roommate and my crush answered. I was surprised but it was really nice to talk to him. I've missed hanging out with them. Well, they weren't doing anything so once again I didn't do anything last night. Oh well. I've just accepted that nothing is going to happen with my crush. It sucks, but that's life. It's kinda weird right now. I have a couple of friends who are telling me that they have friends they want to set me up with. It kinda makes me mad. It shouldn't, but it makes me feel like I'm some kind of project that they are working on. I don't know what my deal is right now. I'm just in a funk....

Snow...

This weather has been so depressing. I'm having a tough week or two and the weather only brings me down more. It comes to be spring and you see everyone walking around campus holding hands, being happy and I just want to be a part of it. I don't like being single. I don't like dating. I feel like I won't ever find anyone. When I do start to like someone...I don't hear from him, talk to him, and I know he's leaving for the summer so it's not like I should care. I have been super emotional lately. I'm homesick and I'm tired of school. I just wish I could go home. Soon enough I guess. It'll be good to finally see my family again next week. And by then the sun will be shining, and my friend will be home from Cody. I talked to her last night and I think she is my biggest happiness. I'm without my best friend and it's hard, but that's how it's going to be from now so I should just get used to it....

I need to scream....

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok. I'm done now....

New Apartment...

Well, I got a new apartment today. It's nice to know that I have one but it's going to be expensive again. It's ok if it's only for 6 months but I'm wondering what's going to happen if I do my student teaching here in Laramie. It's just a lot right now. I'm just so stressed about so many stupid things. I hate it. Oh well. One day at a time....

Grrr...

I get to this point every semester where I just don't want to do anything. Everything is piling up and there's so much to do, but I just don't want to do it. I hate being this lazy. I know I procrastinate a lot, but this is just boredom I think. I don't know. It just seems like all this stuff is just pointless and stupid and not worth it. I guess there's only three more weeks....

Monday...

I didn't get a job today so that kinda sucks. Oh well. That just means I will have to do my homework. I had a pretty fun weekend even tho I didn't really do anything. I would've liked to hang out with the boys but I've already been over that. I miss my friend in Cody a lot and I can't wait for her to come home....although it'll still be another 2 weeks. I'm kinda sad today. I always get this way when I can see the end is near for something. School's almost over so that means my friends will be going home for the summer. It also means I'm going to have to start working at Safeway again. There's nothing wrong with it, I just am going to have to close alot and I'm not going to get to go home very often. I'm also going to be moving soon so I have to figure out all that shit about sub leasing and leasing and deposits and all that shit. No fun. But I better get used to it. i'm going to be moving 3 times in the next year. I have a soccer game tonight so that will cheer me up....

Weekend's over...

So I called my crush on Friday night and his phone must've been on silent. So I left a message for him to call me back. Well, he didn't. so I didn't see him this weekend at all. It's kinda depressing because I may see him next weekend and then maybe the saturday after that...maybe. Then I go home the weekend after that, then school's over. So I guess it was fun while it lasted. Today's plan is to go to the library and work on a portfolio. Yippee skippee. I really don't like making portfolios. Oh well... it's the last one this semester....

Yes, Another post today...

Well, I just wanted to say how my Mortar Board meeting went. I have to say that I feel really honored to be in this honor society. I am one of 44 members this year, chosen out of 300 applicants. The sponsor said that it was the toughest year yet to choose members because they had to pick the cream of the crop. It finally feels like all my hard work is finally paying off....

It's a good day...

Today was a good day. I got to go shopping with some friends. I got a free cookie at lunch. I got a sub job for tomorrow. I think I did well on my physics test. I just saw my crush (but we didn't talk :( ). I got an email from my friend who's teaching in Cody. And I'm eating chips and salsa. Plus I look cute today ;) or at least I feel like it and that' all that matters. It's the small things that make a difference in your day....

Asshole...

I hate my ex. I decided to stop and talk to him today just to be nice and to be an adult about things. He was civil enough when he was talking to me, but he finished the conversation with... "there's a song you should hear. It says exactly how I feel about you." so guess what the song's name is? "I hate everything about you" What an asshole. I'm not really so mad about it. I think it's kinda sad, pathetic and funny. I just wish he would grow up. The good thing is, he's going to california a month earlier than I thought. YAY! I'll keep ya updated....

Long day...

I have class at 11, 2-5 and then I have a Mortar Board meeting at 9pm. I'm not going to get home until 11 maybe. I'm gonna be pooped. But it's my last day of the week for classes. I was having a really weird dream last night about slime, zombies, and sewers. It was really strange. Not scary, but just weird. I hardly ever dream. Man when I do, they're good ones....

Crazy...

It's been a very interesting week. I haven't done anything all day so I've been bored. I did hear some thunder so I'm hoping it will just pour all afternoon. I could really use some soothing rain. I got into an honor society here on campus. I guess it's the top honor you can get here so that's pretty cool. I'm really excited about it. I will have to see how it goes....

I'm worn out...

How bad is it that I'm exhausted already this week and it's only Tuesday? I'm so tired and just worn out... mentally exhausted. I just wanted to drink tonight and have some fun. But hopefully on Friday I will get to go out and let loose a little. I think I might just have to sleep in tomorrow. I don't do it often but I think tomorrow might call for it. But hopefully I will get a job. That would be nice. I could really use the money....

Interesting night....

Well I got home from easter break yesterday and I wasn't home 5 minutes before I got a call from a friend who needed me to come get her from the counselling office. It turns out that she had to be escorted to the hospital. So I was there for a couple of hours last night with her, then I had to run to my soccer game. We lost the game pretty badly, but the kids seemed to have fun and their highlight of the night came from dogpiling me at the end of the game. They are a cute group of boys. I am so tired today and I am not looking forward to having hours upon hours of class today. Oh well. You gotta do what you gotta do....

Easter weekend...

This has been a really fun weekend. I got to go down to Colorado to see my older sister who I hardly ever get to see. We laughed and laughed all weekend long. I got home and my friend and I found her a formal dress from my closet of formals. She looked really good in it (and she can keep it) so she will be the hottest girl at the dance. My other friend left for 3 weeks to do some teaching in Cody. She called me last night at about 12 and told me she was lost in Cody and couldn't find her way back to her boyfriend's parent's house. She is the only one under 21 so she couldn't go to the bars. It was my crush's 21st birthday so it was a big celebration to go to the bar. She makes me laugh when she calls me cuz she's lost. I'm on my way home tomorrow and we have the first soccer game. I'm kinda nervous but I think my kids will have fun and that's all that's important. I will let you know how it goes....

Busy day...

Yesterday was a busy busy day. I got a subbing job finally after 6 weeks of not working so I sat in a 1st grade classroom all day and did nothing because there was a student teacher. But it was fun and I liked her a lot and I got paid for it. Not too bad. I even got a project done. Then I had soccer practice again and I just love these boys. They are so cute and so fun and are happy to be playing. Then I rushed home because I was hosting wine night. I set up the grill and made ribs and brauts. It only took 2 hours to cook them all :) The stupid grill wouldn't heat up right. Anyways, one friend ended up giving another friend a haircut (which turned out awesome) while my other two friends tried to open a bottle of wine without a corkscrew. Well, it was entertaining and eventually they had to go get a corkscrew, but it was all good. We laughed and giggled all night long and it was so much fun. I don't know what I would do without my wine nights. I can't wait for next week's....

Sad...

I just got so depressed tonight. My best friend is leaving for three weeks. I'm going to miss talking to her and seeing her and drinking with her. It also means that my new friends and my crush will prolly not be calling me for three weeks and all this progress I've made with him I feel is going down the drain. It just seems like everything is scattering all over and I'm left here. I hate this feeling but I'm sure tomorrow will be better....

Soccer

Last night I held my first soccer practice for my new group of kids. I was really nervous, not so much for meeting the kids, but for meeting their parents. I had such a good group of parents, I was worried about not having any to help me out. But all went well. I have 11 very cute, very good boys who I think will be a lot of fun this year. I got out and played with them the entire time which was awesome, and I came home with grass stains on my knees. I hurt everywhere today, so I guess that means I got a good workout. I think I might try to call a couple of my guy friends who said they would like to come watch (of course they were drunk when they said this so I doubt they even remember saying it). I think it would go really well if they came and played around with them, because at this age, they love having college boys to play with. Tomorrow we're having wine night and having a bbq. I'm thinking I can bribe the boys into going to soccer practice if I cook for them afterwards. I guess we'll see. We'll have to see what my friends say about it. I don't know if they want to just have a girls night or what. I guess we'll see....

Sayings to go by...

You only live once.

Live, laugh, smile, be happy.

If you think you will, you will.

Love.

Blog...

How cool of a word is that? Blog. Blog blog blog blog blog...ok I'm done. I have my first soccer practice today. I'm pretty nervous about it because they are all new kids. It'll be fun and it will be good. I just did dishes and now I smell like dirty dishes. yuck. I'm gonna grab a shower....

Not such a bad night afterall...

Well, my bad night turned out to be ok. My ex still freaked me out a lot and I was shaking by the time I got to my friends' house where I ended up spending the night. I could stop shaking so I downed a beer really fast. Not such a bright thing to do. So I wasn't feeling the best all night. I went with them to a party in west laramie and I was the D.D. I ended up bringing back 5 drunk guys in my little honda. It was funny. I took them all home, and that ended up taking me all around laramie. But when I got to the guys' house we hung out and had some fun. I realized that you know you're in with a group when one of them will walk around in their boxers infront of you. I ended up making out with my crush for a long while and he got a little bit further than last time ;) But he was not at all feeling good this morning and I felt bad for him. Oh well, I guess that's what you get when you drink alot. Anyway, I might hang out with them again tonight, so we'll have to see how it goes....

Bad night...

I've had a bad night. I was all psyched to do something tonight and I chickened out. I won't call people to see if something is going on because I feel like I am having to beg them to let me hang out with them. It makes me feel like such a loser. Then of course, my friends bail on me this weekend, which I don't blame them. I'm not their whole life. Then my fucking ex calls me, drunk and giggling. He tells me it's my fault that he called because I told him never. Then i'm a huge bitch to him because he just won't go away. I hate having to be mean. It's not in my nature. But HE PISSES ME OFF SOOOO BAD!! I just don't know what to do anymore....

Wine Night and Weird Dreams....

Last night was wine night and it was a lot of fun. I really like hanging out with my girlfriends. One of them got a little mad tho and left early, but that's ok because the rest of us had fun. One of my friends stayed til 10 and we got really bombed. It was fun and all we did was giggle all night long. Then I had this strange dream....I had myself so freaked out this morning. I was dreaming that my friend and I were gambling in vegas and there was a serial killer on the loose. I woke up all of a sudden and looked over and my alarm clock was on the bed next to me. Then I started freaking out about there being someone in my house. Once I woke up a little bit more, I realized I must've been scared and that was the only light in my room on so I must've grabbed it while I was asleep. I don't know. It was really strange...